Why My Hair Dont Grow No More

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Sat, 29 Sep 2012 16:36:32 -0400

Ayaan: "When you're dead I'll move into this house"

Wed, 26 Sep 2012 20:35:36 -0400

Ayaan: "When you're dead I'll move into this house"
Ummm....dude, you're FIVE and you LIVE in this house!

"Overheard Ayaan (age 5): “my parents are dead because I am a grownup”."

Sat, 22 Sep 2012 18:32:53 -0400

“Overheard Ayaan (age 5): “my parents are dead because I am a grownup”.”

It’s true.

Mon, 17 Sep 2012 16:00:44 -0400

It’s true.

Had something delivered. By the time I set it up, my hobo kids...

Mon, 17 Sep 2012 16:00:30 -0400

Had something delivered. By the time I set it up, my hobo kids had already set up a camp in the box. Even taped their taekwando medals as door handles.

There are two types of parents: those who at one point or another have really fought the urge to do...

Wed, 05 Sep 2012 09:23:12 -0400

There are two types of parents: those who at one point or another have really fought the urge to do some serious spanking and those who lie about having the urge to spank.

Do control the urge, spanking doesn’t work, but don’t feel guilty for thinking about it

Trying to maintain a clean house with a couple of kids is like trying to fight a full-grown Hippo...

Tue, 04 Sep 2012 09:29:34 -0400

Trying to maintain a clean house with a couple of kids is like trying to fight a full-grown Hippo with toothpicks. Not only you can’t win, you cannot even imagine it in your wildest dreams. Stressing over it will only accelerate your hair loss (exhibit A: you cannot see it but I am pointing at my head).

Pinky Toe

Mon, 03 Sep 2012 09:28:33 -0400

"Ouch"
"What happened"
"I accidentally bit my pinky toe"
"How?????"

O' Candyland

Sun, 02 Sep 2012 09:29:29 -0400

Kids and I were singing “O’ Canada”. We stopped and Ayaan kept singing: “O, Candyland”. The boy has his priorities straight.

"I have $1000? Wow, I can buy Africa with that much money"

Sat, 01 Sep 2012 09:25:38 -0400

““I have $1000? Wow, I can buy Africa with that much money””

- Safiya when she was 8

Safiya: "Why is your shirt wet?"

Fri, 31 Aug 2012 09:26:35 -0400

Safiya: "Why is your shirt wet?"
Hamza: "I was washing my armpits"
Safiya: "With soap?"
Hamza: "Yes"
Safiya, nodding in approval: "Good"
.
Umm ...

Found this guy spiderman-ing around the hallway. What the heck?

Thu, 30 Aug 2012 15:17:28 -0400

Found this guy spiderman-ing around the hallway. What the heck?

Back in 2010 our family computer mouse had been missing. I spent an insane amount of time looking for it and finally found it under the kitchen refrigerator. Obviously, I put it back near the computer keyboard. A few hours later:

Thu, 30 Aug 2012 09:28:47 -0400

Back in 2010 our family computer mouse had been missing. I spent an insane amount of time looking for it and finally found it under the kitchen refrigerator. Obviously, I put it back near the computer keyboard. A few hours later:
Ayaan: “I found it”
Me: “What did you find?”
Ayaan: “I found the computer mouse”
Me: “No you didn’t, I found it”
Ayaan: “Me and you both found it”
Me: “I found it under the fridge”
Ayaan: "And I found it”
Me: "Where did you find it?”
Ayaan: "I found it right here” (he points at the mouse next to the keyboard)
Me: "I put it there”
Ayaan: "And I put it here”
Me: “Where was it before?”
Ayaan: "It was right here (points at half an inch away from the mouse) and I put it here (points at the mouse). So I found it too"
I don’t think that’s really what “finding” is
Ayaan: "I found the mouse"
Uh, but I thought we both found it. Uh forget it I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, he has a prosperous future in politics.

Me: “For the love of everything cute and cuddly, why are you off bed again?”

Wed, 29 Aug 2012 09:23:13 -0400

Me: “For the love of everything cute and cuddly, why are you off bed again?”
Hamza: “I am scared”
Me: “Okay, you can sleep with your lights on”
Hamza: “I am not scared of monsters, they are not real”
Me: “Then what are you afraid of”
Hamza: “I am afraid of what’s going to happen if an asteroid hits the Earth when I am sleeping”
Me: "Hamza, that's just...just ... just ... uh ... oh shoot! Should've built a bomb shelter in the basement. Argh, now I wont be able to sleep all night"

hammer

Tue, 28 Aug 2012 09:23:07 -0400

Ayaan comes to the basement, picks up a hammer and hits himself on the head.
.
Me: “Why did you do that”
Ayaan, rubbing his head: “I was trying to fix myself”
.
Awww, poor baby!

Up since 3am

Mon, 27 Aug 2012 23:01:07 -0400

Heard noises at 3am. Went out to see. Turned out that kids were changed and ready for school. Busted internal body clock?

“Do you know that song?”

Wed, 15 Aug 2012 02:09:48 -0400

“Do you know that song?”
“Which one?”
“I am sixty and I know it”
“Hehe, it’s not I am sixty and I know it. It’s I am … umm … you’re right. It’s ‘I am sixty and I know it”

“Zeeshan uncle”

Wed, 15 Aug 2012 02:09:13 -0400

“Zeeshan uncle”
“Yes”
“Omair uncle is surprising me with a skateboard tomorrow”
“Oh ya? It’s a complete surprise?”
“Yes, it’s a big surprise”
“Make sure you are surprised”
“I am so surprised I get my surprise tomorrow”

“You are cheating!”

Wed, 15 Aug 2012 02:08:32 -0400

“You are cheating!”
“I am cheating cuz you are cheating”
“But I was cheating cuz you were cheating”

—- Brain, explode!

My kids hit the “too embarrassed to do what you asked us to do because we think you...

Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:26:21 -0400

My kids hit the “too embarrassed to do what you asked us to do because we think you don’t know what you’re talking about” stage a bit too soon :(